Welcome 2012
January 1, 2012
TRULY HAPPY AND NOT AFRAID TO SHOW IT
EMPTY BOTTLES ALL NIGHT
Part II- Letting 2010 Die In Peace: A Simple Toast
January 5, 2011
Currently Listening To: Coming Home by Diddy
Dear Everyone:
“Happy New Years, Brother!” – LML
“F that!…Same bills. Same problems. NOTHING has changed.” – Javier Pilla
“Haha. But it doesn’t have to be so. Our resolve to change can be the change.” – LML
As I stood with my glass of champagne ready to render the noisy night with a simple toast, I thought not of what I would include to memorialize 2010. Instead, I profusely thought about what I would leave out. My job was to take volumes worth of acrimony and hurt and condense it into one pithy rendition of redemption and resolve. Thankfully, given the eight months I had to mentally rehearse, it seamlessly poured forth without one curse.
Clock Strikes midnight *Lifts glass calmly, yet firmly.*
“Here is to the worst year of my short, adult life… Given the transgressions I committed in this year, I am hesitant to call myself a man. However, the fortunate fact that all my iniquities were met with swift, rehabilitating punishment reassures me that it was not all in vain. For I have relinquished my selfish, childish ways and embraced the humility and decency that had been rotting away six feet under.
Here is to the worst year of my short, adult life…I shudder with disbelief at the countless nights I lay on my bed anxiously waiting for the call that never came. I shudder with horror at how excruciatingly long the night turned out to be. I shudder with great regret at how many times I made that restricted call. But I shudder no more. 2010 is now dead and gone.
Welcome 2011!
Here is to the most promising year of my short, adult life…Here is to my new beginning. Away from all those who weren’t present at 11:59pm December 31, 2010-you are all now in my rearview mirror. To my loved ones present here today, I have one thing to say. I love you and would give my life for you.”
*Takes a swig of champagne*
Love,
LML
“I’m coming home
I’m coming home
Tell the World I’m coming home
Let the rain wash away all the pain of yesterday
I know my kingdom awaits and they’ve forgiven my mistakes
I’m coming home, I’m coming home
Tell the World that I’m coming”
The Mark is 233
December 19, 2011
Once upon a time, I urged you to await my mischievous rhyme,
Caution to the wise, my word is real and by it I shall always abide,
So today I spew my wretched verses, now that redemption is mine
Your name remains anonymous, your spirit no longer at my side.
The mark of the beast is 6-6-6, but on this auspicious night the mark is 233
A time of blissful indulgence, a pitch-dark night without a star-lit portrait
Rather than damn me for eternity, you cast me from limbo and set me free.
Sleepless nights soaked in agony, they wither away at the scent of your hair
An enchanting fume, a smog of toxin, a stealthy, silent killer with no remorse
Tossing and turning, panting and sighing, we catapult towards imminent despair.
One hand grabs firmly, the other loosely, a wretched dream has run its course
With a half-packed suitcase in each hand, you bid farewell with the most stoic stare
Calmly and unfazed, I control the tremor and open the door you did not use to enter
She tries to look back for one final picture, but I shut the door and avoid the snare
Her face is an apparition, devoid of all reality, but the thick wrinkles in every smile
The slant of her eyes, windows of her soul, are second only to the slant of her guile
But in memory of my innocence, I will forgive, and not allow her lies to further defile
Today I bury the haunted memories of room 233
Thanksgiving: A Time To Serve And Give Thanks
November 24, 2011
Currently Listening To: Headlines by Drake
Dear Everyone:
Today I am thankful to those selfless people who have laughed with me during the ups and have stood at my side during the downs. These people have demonstrated an abundance of love, loyalty, and service to me:
To Mommy and Daddy: From before my conception, you wanted and loved me. From conception on, you have selflessly devoted your life to my continued success and loved me second to no one. You are the only ones in this world who truly care about my whereabouts and whether I come home or not. When I seek the world for unconditional love, my findings always bring me back to you. The way you give and expect nothing in return is baffling and mind-boggling. I simply cannot articulate the feeling this inspires. I love you and I would give my life for you.
To My Close Friends: Y’all have had my back every time I needed you. Ranging from dodging fists of fury, to venting about emotionally-taxing issues, to just catching a drink after a long day. You have shown me more service and loyalty than anyone else. Believe me, LML doesn’t forget who was behind him when stuff went down. Likewise, he won’t forget when stuff goes up.
To Myself: You are obtuse and highly idealistic. You commit to implausible causes and then pay the price. But you have a resilience that is unparalleled. You have a learning curve, which although moving at the speed of snail, is consistently getting better. You learn from your mistakes and move on accordingly. In short, thank you for loving yourself enough to not quit. Thank you for remaining loyal to your dreams.
This Thanksgiving I implore that we take time to reflect and ponder about the people who validate this day. The ones who safeguard our best interests and invariably stand at our side. During the good, the bad, and the ugly. Think not about how they can serve you. Think about how you can reciprocate and ultimately multiply their breathtaking input of love.
In my experience, you will truly serve only what you love. Because as the prophet says, service is love made visible. If you love friends, you will serve your friends. If you love community, you will serve your community. If you love money, you will serve your money. And if you love only yourself, you will serve only yourself. And you will have only yourself.
So no more winning. Instead, try to love others and serve others and hopefully find those who love and serve you in return.
-Stephen Colbert
Sincerely,
LML
Happy Birthday Daddy
September 11, 2011
Currently Listening To: God Bless The USA by Lee Greenwood
9/11 is a day indelibly tarnished with the stain of hatred and vengeance of a select, morally bankrupt few. 9/11 is the day, forever living in infamy, to remember all those who died and shed their lives.
However, 9/11 is also the day I say Happy Birthday to my mentor, my friend, and my superhero. My father.
As another sun rises over the anniversary of this tragic day, I ponder. How many fathers never came home to tuck in their children that day? I cringe imagining how many fathers never even met their children. I shudder at the thought of having to deal with that loss. I could not have withstood it. Of that I’m certain. This is why in the mist of the nation-wide mourning, I feel it proper and one-hundred percent appropriate to plaster the biggest smile on my face and be grateful for what I did not lose on that day:
Daddy, the love I have for you is unrivaled, unparalleled, and untouchable. You have shown me through words and actions what it is to be a just and caring man. You have shown me what dedication and commitment truly entails. You have both pushed and inspired me to be the best that I can be. Anything and everything I am today, and will ever become, is because of your persistent sacrifices and the undying embers of your love.
Since I have use of reason, you have been my hero and idol. There is nothing that I would not do for you, old man. Perhaps right now I have nothing more than these simple, cliché words to offer to you. But keep in mind that the day will come when I will be in the position to return in spades all that you have done. Give me time, and you will see. I will be your cane when you drag your feet. I will be your eyes when you see blurry. I will be at your side when your world seemingly fades before you. My love, however, will never fade away. It will inexorably burn for all time.
My heart goes out to all those who lost a loved one on that ghastly day. You are in my prayers.
Sincerely,
LML
Unanswered Prayers
September 3, 2011
Currently Listening To: Give Me Everything by Pitbull
Dear Everyone:
Across the years I’ve heard a silly expression, uttered mostly by relationship-aggrieved individuals: “If he (or she) doesn’t want you, then he (or she) doesn’t deserve you.” While I do grasp what they mean, personally, I find that saying to be so far from the truth. Just because someone doesn’t want you doesn’t mean they aren’t worthy of you, or any less valuable. It simply means that person doesn’t want YOU. Simple as that.
For whatever reason, that person isn’t into you, or refuses to be into you. But why does that have to be a bad thing?
For those of you musing over this question, listen to Unanswered Prayers by Garth Brooks. IT IS AMAZING. More importantly, it speaks the truth about how things happen for a specific reason and how “losing” one opportunity can open the door for an even better one. But say you don’t buy into that cliché mumbo jumbo, or have good taste in music. Fine. Think about it more in the way my father once put it to me.
“Be thankful to the woman who refuses to give you a chance; she just did you the biggest favor or your life. Imagine, if she had strung you along. Picture the hurt.”
By refusing your advances, that person is actually doing you a great service. He or she is saving you the agony of trying to be with someone who isn’t compatible with you in the most important area, mutuality of feelings. Without this mutuality, nothing can be built, or created. So please, do yourselves a favor, and thank the hell out of them.
I’m not talking out of cynicism or pent-up anger. I’m merely talking out of experience as the guy who at times pursued with all his heart, only to be refused (not in vain). As a result, my humble advice is to go after the one you care about with all that you have. But when it is evident that the other side won’t come around, fold and realize one beautiful truth.
“Sometimes God’s greatest gifts are unanswered prayers.”
Sincerely,
LML
Rants While In Ecuador
June 29, 2011
Currently Listening To: Crush by David A.
Dear Everyone:
Time away from home has done me wonders. It has relaxed my mind, granting me the opportunity to confront and tame dormant emotions. More importantly, it has given me the chance to ponder and reflect upon where I am, where I should be, and where I’m going in life. And my realization has been that there can be no more “trying” to succeed or “attempting” to better myself. No, the time for obscuring my present with considerations of how life could be better has officially expired. The time of walking backwards towards the sun is now, and forever, over.
I categorically refuse to dog-paddle like a good portion of my generation in a cesspool of malarkey (a nicer way of saying bullshit) and excuses. My life has been radiantly flashing right before my eyes for a while now, so I’m going to hurl myself right into the center of the limelight, where I have always had the potential, and God-given right, to be. I’m going to slow down the clock and carefully pour more grains of sand into the hour glass of time. Yet, to do all this, I must understand the limits of my mortality, embrace my infinite number of faults, and accept the good and bad of my past, specifically the latter. To be as great as I can be, I must succeed in realizing all three.
Perfection is not what I seek. By nature and philosophically speaking, we, human beings, are imperfect. Self-improvement and realization of my potential is what I aspire to. I, like everyone else, possess the ability to maximize my abilities and position myself as closely as humanly possible to the unattainable notion of perfection. I may never get to the place I adamantly yearn to arrive at, but in the process of trying to I will undoubtedly become greater than if I had not partaken in the quest. This I can accept and live with. However, there is one clear certitude. I will not have life define me by the conformity and timidness of my pondering; rather, I will have it highlight me by the audacity and boldness of my actions.
Sincerely,
LML
On The Brink
June 6, 2011
Currently Listening To: Written In Stars by Tenie Tempah (feat. Eric Turner).
Dear Everyone:
On June 1, 2011, I had the distinct honor of coming back to the Ron Brown Program as a proud and successful product of its ample opportunities and address the sophomores and juniors aspiring to get into law school. I think I surprised a few people with my insight and ability to speak in public. However, I surprised myself even more, but not with the profundity or eloquence of my words. Ironically, what surprised me was the self-recognition of my current accomplishments. I graduated undergrad Magna Cum Laude, got into a good law school with a great scholarship, got deeply involved with the creation of a non-profit organization, and now had the honor of imparting mentoring words in the minds of those who also foster the dream of becoming lawyers.
Before uttering my first word to the audience, I uttered these words to myself, “Look at how far you’ve come, you’re on the brink of success and with no wings to fly back.”
After speaking extensively from the heart, someone asked me. “If you could go back in time (one year back) what would you do different when preparing for the law school application process?” My answer in a nutshell. “I would rid myself of all the petty distractions that one year ago temporarily deterred me from my end goal. I would not wait until the last minute to give it my all. Most importantly, I would remind myself that, while a horde of underprivileged individuals across the country have a million excuses for failing, I have absolutely no excuse for not succeeding…There are no excuses for anyone here today!”
The nodding heads of all those in attendance reassured me that I struck the right chord. Through experience derived from my perseverance I had left the indelible mark I sought to leave. Once a full-time student, I was now a part-time teacher. Wow!
My once fragmented world begins to seamlessly converge before my eyes and paves in gold the path of what is to come.
Sincerely,
LML
Giving Support To The Locked-out Working Man
March 15, 2011
There are two parties in this country. One works for the “rich.” And the other works for the “poor.” Unfortunately, no one seems to work for the working man. The one who doesn’t bleed enough for a tax cut, but sweats “too much” for EBT or welfare.
Today is the day you can help to give this underrepresented majority a louder voice in a deaf and dumb Corporate America:
WHAT: On February 7, 2011, Slant/Fin Corporation, which supplies countless distributors across the country with heaters, boilers, and baseboards, locked out 215 of its union workers after 8 weeks of contract negotiations, in which management demanded across-the -board cuts in benefits.
A few days later, Slant/Fin began using replacement workers to usurp their positions.
INFO: The workers, most of whom are not proficient in english, hail from Haiti, Latin America, and Eastern Europe. Their average salary is $10 an hour. The few non-monetary benefits that they have in their contract have been acquired through decades of tough, union negotiations.
STATUS QUO: Slant/Fin is enjoying a banner year of economic success, has recently lost its main competitor in the region and avows that their demands for concessions are not driven by financial hardship. STILL. Slant/Fin wants to take money out of its workers pockets.
The workers standing outside, most working at the company for 10-50 years, are still waiting for fair treatment and a contract that recognizes the countless years that they have invested into its growth.
RESOLUTION: On http://slantfin.com/ there is list of Slant/Fin’s NY distributors and their respective emails (which are provided below).
Please, write ONE concise email, addressed to all the distributors and CC it to Slant/Fin owner, Mel Dubin, expressing your disgust (as past, present, or potential customers) at how they condone and ultimately continue financing this worker oppression.
-Tell them shame on them for not standing up for middle class jobs and worker’s rights!
-Tell them this is unfair and unjust!
-Tell them to dump Slant/Fin Corp!
CONTACT INFORMATION:
OWNER MEL DUBIN- MDubin@Slantfin.com
DISTRIBUTORS: COPY AND PASTE ALL EMAIL ADDRESSES INTO ONE SINGLE MESSAGE
richard.thompson@blakeequip.com
bpowell@universalappliance.com
pfilippone@northshoreplumbingsupply.com
george@northportplumbingsy.com
george@northportplumbingsy.com
DISCLAIMER: I do not represent, speak for, or act on behalf of the aforementioned union. This written notice was a personal venture of mine aimed at fighting for worker’s rights. I am not attempting to coerce or manipulate anyone out of business. I simply wish to bring awareness and resolution to this grave, pending problem.
All help is welcome and immensely appreciated.
Infamous Words Of The Last Year
March 7, 2011
Best Quips:
1. “I knew I was talking to a baby in diapers.”- Angry Cougar
“Well, we got something in common then. In five years, when you hit 40, you will also be wearing diapers.” -Me
2. ”Love is perfect. I will have the model wife, with the white picket-fence, and my 2.5 kids.”-Lin Ochoa
“Yea, love is so perfect that .5 will be yours and the 2 will come from your wife’s previous marriage.” -Me
3. “Did you call me a ‘bischhhhhh??’”-Girl at the bar with thick accent.
“No, I did not… I was simply describing your behavior to my friend.”-Me
4. “God! You Hispanics don’t speak english.” Co-worker
“Last I checked your native tongue of ebonics wasn’t english either.”-Me
5. “Would you consider applying to our law school?”- Admission person
“Look, I’ll approach your question the same way I approach my dating-life. I’ll go on a first date with anyone. Now, if I like you then of course we will see each other again. In other words, yes i’ll apply to your school, but whether I see you again depends on what you offer me.” -Me
“Hahahaha. Never heard that one before. But I love it!”- Admission person
Words Of Wisdom:
1. “Don’t flood the village simply because the villagers are thirsty.” -Dr. Javier
2. “I think the easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly.”-Scrubs
3. “I swear dealing with them is like talking into a vacuum: you give everything and get nothing in return.” -Union Lawyer
4. “Sometimes you got to run before you can walk.” -Iron Man
5. “Sometimes frank is good. Sometimes it shows desperation…Don’t show desperation.”-Lights Out
6. “When a boy dates a girl, they go out for a year or two and then the girl breaks up with him….I know what I’m talking about, dude.” -Jenny Lian, age 9.
Breakups:
1.”My problem is I can’t understand it. It’s only been a week since our break up. How have you moved on already?”- Me
“Here is the thing. To you we broke up one week ago. To me we have been broken up for 3 months now.” Ailin Lian
2. “Your best revenge against her is to find happiness without her.”- Javier Pilla and I
3. “Don’t make someone your priority, while allowing yourself to be someone’s option.”-Unknown.
Insults I Made:
1.” My dear, five years has passed and the whole world grew up and moved on. But not you. Emotionally, romantically, and intellectually you continue to be potential with no purpose. Good night!” -To my first love
2. “It isn’t that I think your lying about how you feel about me. It’s just that I don’t think there is an ounce of truth involved in your allegation.”-To girl telling me she “likes” me.
3. “There is a reason that guys don’t like you. It’s not cause you aren’t pretty or have a bad personality. No. It’s that you waddle around with a stick up so far up your rectum that all the words that come out smell like crap.”- To Brenda Cruz
4. “Your beard looks like dozens of tiny hamsters died on your face.” -To my boss.
Insults I Received:
1. “You are a flower with soft petals.” -Chung Lee
2. “You are a back-stabbing manipulator.” -My first love.
3. “No one ever said a republican was ever intellectually participant in government affairs.” -Union Lawyer
Most Touching Words I Received:
1. You tell me you are not a good person. But I say you are. Why? Well, your truly sorry for what you did and won’t do it again. A bad person doesn’t care enough to feel remorse or have the resolve to change. For that, you are a great person.” Cathy
2. “You did good.”-Dad
Looking Back At Freshman Year In College
March 1, 2011
Me: Freshman Year
Currently Listening To: Facedown by The Red Jumpsuit
(Disclaimer: I am not casting judgement or excoriation on anyone. I am simply recounting my experience and giving my appraisal of it)
Dear Everyone:
Currently, my life is hectic and busy as hell. Upon completing my undergrad at St. John’s one semester early and securing law school acceptances/scholarships for September, I took on one more job. In addition to this, I got very involved in my father’s union work and, of course, this means he exploits any of my remaining free time. In the name of “family.” So whenever I do have the privileged opportunity to wind down or actively acquire a six-pack or two, or three, I do.
Saturday I was surprised by my friends by going to a party in BK. Which apparently stands for Brooklyn, and not Burger King. In retrospect, going to a house party in Brooklyn sounds more logical than going to one in Burger King. Anyways…I went to the house and relived in one night my whole freshman year of college.
People were drinking, chugging, stumbling, grunting, flirting, groping, and “dancing.” In short, it was one gigantic, Double-Whopper sized orgy……with cheese.
As I closely looked and listened to these individuals who had clearly checked into lala land Eons before my arrival, I noticed something truly disconcerting. Many of them, if not most, were several years older than me, had “wifeys” (which apparently can be used in verb form. e.g. I wifed that ***** up) and “kids,” and got plastered EVERY single weekend. All this made me ask myself. Should fully-fledged adults really continue to behave so sophomorically and eternally live freshman year?
I remember being 18 and experiencing freshman year. Yea, I partied hard and enjoyed myself to the fullest. But somewhere along the line things changed. Playing the same, meaningless games with their even more meaningless victories grew old very quickly. Every grain of sand that piled in the fragile hour-glass of my life brought me further away from a mundane, sophomoric existence. And closer to a much-needed adulthood phase. This is what granted me the discipline and diligence to graduate undergrad Magna Cum Laude and get accepted with a scholarship to a New York, Tier I Law School.
There is a time and a place for everything. Clearly, a house party in Brooklyn every single weekend for the adult with countless responsibilities is neither…It’s time to grow up.
“When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”
Sincerely,
LML
